the other day, first year of 2008, i was watching the american film institute's lifetime achievement award for al pacino.  his friends gave him tremendously good citations as an actor and clips from his major films were also shown.  for one reason or the other, this thought came to my mind: "what would my family and friends remember of me when i'm old or gone?" i guess we all want to be remembered for something -- but i don't know what that would be for me.

it's a yearly ritual: i clean out my closet, drawers, even the pantry.  i find things that i should have found many months ago.  i found out that i have 3 boxes of christmas cards (which obviously will be sent next year -- if i don't forget); that i have a woven box of all my wallets (used and new), with diego's hair in a plastic when he came home and decided to go bald, and shaved his head. i also clean out my ref.  i found a container of frozen mashed banana which i proceeded to bake using leftover nuts, raisins, flax seed, and a dash of maple syrup that diego brought home (oh, i forget when).

i also love recycling / reusing old cards, ribbons, boxes, anything that i find recyclable. so the gifts i gave away were wrapped in boxes that i got from shopping, and adorned with ribbons and cards that i have recycled.  sometimes i used ordinary newspapers or the glossy pages of old magazines.  i think that buying all those stuff can sometimes be unnecessary.

i also made christmas decors from old claypots, walis tambo, parts of windchimes that won't work anymore, dried flowers and gold and silver paints. 

i like giving gifts during the holidays.  it's my way of saying "thank you" and "i remember you" to family and friends.  and i realized some years ago, that this does not have to be expensive and commercialized. 

cleaning out and making new stuff is also a psychological way of my ending a year -- from where i accumulated stuff from friends and family -- and welcoming another year -- which hopefully will bring lots of good things, again.

happy new year to all!